Date ideas
75 long-distance date ideas
Living apart doesn’t mean giving up date night. Here are ideas for a video call, for doing the same thing at the same time in different places, and for making the most of your next visit.
On a video call
1 to 2 hours · $10 to $15 each · playful
Same recipe, two kitchens
One recipe, two stoves and a call on the counter.
Cooking the same meal at the same time can make dinner feel shared, even in two different kitchens.
The fun part: Show each other your progress as you go, mistakes included.
2 to 3 hours · Free with a service you already have · cozy
Press play together
One movie, two couches and a countdown from three.
Laughing at the same moment in the same movie can make two couches feel like one.
The fun part: Pause halfway for an intermission and a two-minute snack review.
30 to 45 minutes · Free · thoughtful
Walk me through your neighborhood
A live tour of your streets, narrated by you.
Seeing the corner store, the funny sign and the dog they wave to can fill in the picture of their days apart.
The fun part: Narrate like a tour guide, with very dramatic facts about ordinary places.
About 15 minutes · Free · playful
Draw each other from memory
Two sketches, no photos allowed, one very funny reveal.
Drawing someone from memory can show exactly what you notice about them, and the results are usually hilarious.
The fun part: Add one detail only you would know, like a favorite sweater.
About an hour a week · Free to $15 each · thoughtful
Book club of two
Same book, your own pace, one call a week to talk it over.
Reading the same story on your own time and talking it over can give you a running thread between calls.
The fun part: Each bring one favorite line and one question to every call.
About 45 minutes · $5 to $10 each · playful
Brinner across time zones
Breakfast for one of you, dinner for the other, one call.
When one of you is starting the day and the other is ending it, sharing one meal can turn the time difference into something fun.
The fun part: The morning person shares plans. The evening person shares the best part.
About an hour, plus delivery · $30 to $40 each, with fees · playful
Order each other dinner
You pick their meal, they pick yours, and you open them together.
Choosing a meal for someone far away can be a small, practical way to take care of them, with a surprise at the door.
The fun part: Keep your choice secret until the food arrives at their door.
About 45 minutes · Free · thoughtful
Plan the first three hours
The greeting, the first meal and what you do next, planned together.
Imagining the moment you see each other again, in detail, can give the wait a shape and something warm to look forward to.
The fun part: Each keep one small surprise the other doesn’t get to hear about.
About 15 minutes · Free · thoughtful
Find the moon together
Look for the moon from wherever you are, together on a call.
Looking up at the same moon from two places can make the miles between you feel a little smaller.
The fun part: Describe what you see like a nature narrator, clouds and all.
20 to 30 minutes · Free · cozy
The crossword call
One puzzle, two pencils, solved out loud together.
Solving one puzzle out loud gives you an easy, cozy way to be together without needing anything big to talk about.
The fun part: Whoever gets the last clue picks the next puzzle.
20 to 30 minutes · Free · playful
The call-in radio show
Host a tiny radio show for an audience of one.
Hosting a show just for them gives you a playful way to share the songs, stories and news from your week.
The fun part: Read a very dramatic weather report from your window.
20 to 30 minutes · Free · thoughtful
Three keepsakes, three stories
Show three things from your shelves and tell the story behind each.
The stories behind the things you keep can show your partner who you were before you met, one object at a time.
The fun part: Your partner guesses the story before you tell it.
About an hour · $20 to $35 each · adventurous
Online escape room for two
Solve a live online puzzle room as a team of two.
Racing the clock as a team gives you plenty to cheer about, and you get to see how each other’s mind works.
The fun part: Pick a team name and a victory pose before the clock starts.
About 2 hours · $20 to $45 each · adventurous
Take a live class together
Be beginners at the same time, on the same screen.
Starting from zero at the same moment can turn two screens into one classroom, with plenty to laugh about.
The fun part: Hold up what you made to the camera at the same moment.
2 to 3 hours · $15 to $40 each · cozy
A livestream show for two
Tickets to the same livestreamed show, watched together on a call.
Watching the same live show at the same moment can give you a real night out together, from two couches.
The fun part: Dress up a little, as if you had seats side by side.
45 minutes to an hour · Free · adventurous
Stroll a city neither has seen
Pick a far-off city and wander its streets on a map, together.
Exploring somewhere new at the same time gives you fresh things to notice together, even from two chairs.
The fun part: Each find one shop you’d walk into and one bench you’d sit on.
45 minutes to an hour · Free · adventurous
Tour a far-off museum together
Pick a museum across the world and wander it on two screens.
Wandering a museum neither of you has seen gives you new things to notice together, and a place to visit someday.
The fun part: Build a tiny three-piece exhibit together and give it a grand title.
30 to 45 minutes · Free · playful
Guess my hometown
Five questions about where you grew up, and the stories behind them.
Guessing about each other’s hometowns can bring out stories you’d never think to tell on an ordinary call.
The fun part: Wrong guesses earn a story instead of a point.
45 minutes to an hour · $2 to $5 each · cozy
Make each other a card
Make a card by hand on a call, with the cameras looking away.
Making something by hand for each other can turn a quiet call into a keepsake that arrives days later.
The fun part: Describe your progress in the vaguest way possible.
About 2 hours · Free · thoughtful
Plan a meet-in-the-middle trip
Find a place between you and dream up the weekend.
Planning a trip that meets you in the middle can give the time apart a destination and a weekend to look forward to.
The fun part: Each pick one thing for the trip the other would never think of.
20 to 30 minutes · Free · playful
Act out our best moments
Charades, but every clue is a moment from your story together.
Acting out your favorite shared moments can bring back the stories you love, with a lot of laughing along the way.
The fun part: No words allowed, so it even works when the house is asleep.
45 minutes to an hour · Free · cozy
Holiday lights on video
Walk or roll to see the lights where you each live, on video.
Showing each other the lights near home can bring a little of your holiday season into theirs.
The fun part: Narrate each display like a very festive sports broadcast.
About an hour · $5 to $15 each · cozy
Gift-wrapping party on a call
Wrap gifts together on a call, including one for each other.
Wrapping side by side on a call can turn a holiday chore into a cozy evening, with one gift for each other at the end.
The fun part: Wrap one small gift for each other with the camera looking away.
2 to 3 hours · Free to $10 each · playful
Team up in an online game
Pick a two-player online game and play on the same team.
Playing on the same team can give you a shared goal, inside jokes and a win to celebrate from two different rooms.
The fun part: Name your team and give your characters matching outfits.
About an hour · Free · playful
A costume party for two
One theme, one closet each and a big reveal on camera.
Dressing up from whatever is in the closet can bring out your silliest sides and give you a reveal to laugh about for weeks.
The fun part: No buying allowed: build the whole costume from what you already have.
Two short calls, hours apart · $2 to $5 each · playful
Count down to two midnights
Ring in the new year twice: once at your midnight, once at theirs.
Celebrating each midnight on its own clock can turn the distance into two new year moments instead of one.
The fun part: Count down at your midnight, then again at theirs.
30 to 45 minutes · Free · thoughtful
Our first messages, read aloud
Scroll back to the very beginning and read it out loud together.
Hearing how it started, in your own words, can remind you how far you’ve come and how much you’ve shared since.
The fun part: Read your own first messages aloud in your most dramatic voice.
20 to 30 minutes · $3 to $8 each · thoughtful
Birthday candles on a call
One cupcake each, one candle each and one very off-key song.
Lighting a candle at the same moment can make a birthday feel shared, even when you can’t hug in person.
The fun part: Sing together, off-key encouraged, then blow out both candles.
30 minutes to an hour · Free · cozy
Pack with me the night before
Keep each other company while one of you packs for the visit.
Packing together on a call can turn the last night of the wait into the first part of the visit.
The fun part: The one staying home picks one outfit for the first day.
About 2 hours · $5 to $10 each · cozy
Picnic in two parks
Two blankets, two parks and one long, lazy call.
Eating outside at the same time can make long summer days feel shared, even under two different skies.
The fun part: Show each other the best view from your blanket.
Apart, at the same time
A few minutes a day for a week · Free · thoughtful
Your sunset, my sunrise
Trade a photo of your sky every day for a week.
Trading a photo of your sky every day can show you the same world from two places and make the distance feel smaller.
The fun part: Your sunset may land in their morning. That’s part of the fun.
About 2 hours, plus shipping · $20 to $30 with domestic postage · thoughtful
The themed care package
A small box with a theme and a note for every item.
A box they can hold, with a note for every item, can bring a little of your world into theirs for days after it arrives.
The fun part: Write a short note for every item explaining why it’s in the box.
About an hour · Free · thoughtful
Open when… letters for the wait
Letters for the long days and the happy ones, sealed and waiting.
Letters waiting for the long days and the happy ones can give your partner a piece of you whenever they need it.
The fun part: Put one memory, one thing you love now and one thing ahead in each.
About an hour · Free · thoughtful
The liner notes playlist
Ten songs and one line about why each one made the list.
Songs carry stories. Add a line about why you picked each one, and your partner gets to hear a little of your life.
The fun part: Include one song they’ll probably tease you about.
About 2 hours, with shopping · $10 to $15 each · playful
The snack swap by mail
Five local snacks each, opened one at a time on a call.
Tasting each other’s local favorites can be a fun way into each other’s everyday world, and the unboxing makes a great call.
The fun part: Review each snack like a very serious food critic, then crown a winner.
30 to 45 minutes to make · Free · cozy
Paper chain countdown
One paper link for every day until you’re together.
Tearing off one link a day can make the wait feel lighter, and a note inside each one gives you something to look forward to.
The fun part: Write a tiny note inside every link to read on its day.
About 2 hours, plus shipping · $35 to $60 with domestic postage · playful
The countdown box
A small wrapped gift for each of the last seven days.
A tiny gift to open each morning before a visit can turn the last week of waiting into something to enjoy.
The fun part: Make the last gift a clue about something you’ll do on the visit.
20 to 30 minutes · Free · thoughtful
Three pins on my map
Send three places from your town, each with a story.
Seeing their favorite places before a visit can help you picture their days, with plans ready for when you arrive.
The fun part: Your partner guesses what each pin is before reading the story.
A few minutes a day · Free · cozy
Things I’ll show you
One photo a day of something you can’t wait to show them.
A photo a day of something waiting for them can turn the countdown into a little preview of the visit.
The fun part: Check them off together, one by one, during the visit.
30 to 45 minutes · Free · playful
A movie trailer for our visit
Record a dramatic 30-second trailer for your next visit.
Turning your next visit into a dramatic movie trailer can make the countdown something to laugh about together.
The fun part: Start with “In a world where…” in your deepest trailer voice.
30 minutes to an hour a week · $2 to $5 each · thoughtful
Letters with real stamps
Slow, handwritten letters, one a week, by real mail.
Handwriting a letter makes room for the things you don’t say on calls, and a real envelope is something to keep.
The fun part: Tuck in one small flat thing, like a ticket stub or a doodle.
20 to 30 minutes · $2 to $5 each · thoughtful
Leaf rubbings by mail
Crayon rubbings of your fall leaves, mailed to their door.
Sending the shapes of your season can give your partner a small, real piece of where you are.
The fun part: Label every leaf with where you found it.
A week of snapshots, then an hour · $30 to $50 each · adventurous
Disposable camera swap
Shoot a week of your life on film, then trade the prints.
Seeing your partner’s ordinary week through a film camera can give you a real picture of their days, and prints you can hold.
The fun part: You won’t see a single photo until the prints come back.
About an hour of notes · $8 to $20 with domestic postage · thoughtful
A book with your notes inside
Mail a favorite book with your notes and underlines in the margins.
A book with your notes in the margins can let your partner hear your voice on every page, even on a quiet night alone.
The fun part: Add a few notes that are only about the two of you.
About an hour to make · $5 to $10 · playful
The photo puzzle by mail
A photo of you two, cut into a puzzle and mailed in pieces.
Putting your faces back together, piece by piece, can make a sweet little mystery out of an ordinary envelope.
The fun part: Hold back one piece and send it a few days later.
About 2 hours to make and mail · $5 to $15 each · cozy
One ornament, two homes
Make or find one small ornament and mail it for their home.
A small ornament from each other can give your holiday season a shared tradition, even in two homes.
The fun part: Pick or make one that says something about this year together.
About 3 hours · $15 to $30 each · playful
Movie night out, miles apart
See the same new movie on the same day, then trade reviews.
Seeing the same new movie in two theaters can give you a big night out to share, even when you can’t sit side by side.
The fun part: Text each other one emoji the moment the credits roll.
Most of a day · Free · adventurous
The parallel day out
Same theme, two towns and one day of photos and voice notes.
Spending the same kind of day in two towns can give you twin adventures to compare, and plenty to talk about afterward.
The fun part: Send a voice note from every stop, like a travel show host.
2 to 4 hours · Free · adventurous
Plan their afternoon from afar
Plan an afternoon in their town from a map, then they go.
Planning an afternoon in their town can show how much you notice, and gives you a way to be there without being there.
The fun part: Hide one small surprise in the plan, like a garden you found on the map.
15 minutes a day for a week · Free · adventurous
A new skill in a week
Learn the same small skill for a week and show it off on a call.
Learning the same thing at the same time can make you teammates, and the progress videos are half the fun.
The fun part: Send a progress video every day, wobbles and all.
A few minutes · Free · cozy
Voice notes for their morning
A one-minute voice note waiting for them when they wake up.
Hearing your voice first thing can make their morning feel less far away, even if you recorded it at midnight.
The fun part: Tell them one thing you noticed today that they’d love.
30 minutes to an hour · Free · playful
The coupon book for our visit
Handmade coupons to cash in on your next visit.
A coupon book for the visit can give you both a list of small, kind things to look forward to.
The fun part: Include one very silly coupon, like “Good for one dramatic slow clap.”
About an hour to prepare · Free · thoughtful
A birthday in twelve little notes
Twelve small notes across their birthday, timed to their clock.
Send a note every hour or so on their time, and it’ll feel like you’re there all day.
The fun part: Each note holds a memory, a song, an old photo or a reason to smile.
30 minutes to an hour · Free · thoughtful
Twenty little things about us
Twenty small, specific things you love about the two of you.
Writing down small, specific things you love about your relationship can give you both a list to reread on long days.
The fun part: Keep every item small and specific, like the way they say goodnight.
30 minutes to an hour · $3 to $8 each · playful
A giant chalk note for them
Write a giant message in sidewalk chalk and send them the photo.
A message big enough to see from a window can make an ordinary patch of ground feel like a love letter from far away.
The fun part: Make it big enough to photograph from a window or the top of the steps.
When you visit each other
A whole day · Free, or what a normal day costs · thoughtful
Show me your ordinary
Skip the big plans and live one ordinary day of your partner’s life.
Living an ordinary day of your partner’s life helps you picture them when you’re apart, and can make your calls afterward feel closer.
The fun part: Getting the full routine, boring parts included.
About 20 minutes to make · Free · playful
The arrivals sign
Make a big, silly sign and wait at arrivals like a very proud driver.
A handmade sign at arrivals can make your partner laugh the second they walk out, and turns the first hello into an event.
The fun part: Writing their name like a driver would, with a silly title added.
15 to 30 minutes · Free · thoughtful
Hide notes for the trip home
Tuck small notes into their bag to find on the journey home.
Finding small notes on the way home can soften a goodbye, and gives your partner a piece of the visit to carry with them.
The fun part: Hiding one note somewhere they won’t find for weeks.
2 to 3 hours · About $15 to $30 · cozy
First night, hometown takeout
Your first dinner together: the local dish they keep hearing about.
Sharing the local food you’ve described on calls makes room for a slow first night, and gives the visitor a real taste of your world.
The fun part: Finally tasting the dish they’ve been describing on calls for months.
A weekend · Free · cozy
The no-alarms weekend
A reunion weekend with no plans, no alarms and nowhere to be.
After weeks of scheduled calls, a weekend with no plans makes room for simply being in the same place.
The fun part: Turning every alarm off and letting breakfast happen whenever.
Most of a day · Free · thoughtful
Five places that made you
The host shows five places that shaped them, with the story of each.
Seeing the places that shaped your partner brings their stories to life. You’ll get to picture who they were before you met.
The fun part: Hearing the story that goes with each place, even the embarrassing ones.
Most of a day · About $15 to $30 · playful
Our call dates, in person
Do your favorite call dates together, finally in the same room.
Doing your favorite call dates side by side turns months of screen time into shared memories, and can make the next call feel closer.
The fun part: Cooking the call-date recipe in one kitchen, with one very small counter.
A whole day · About $40 to $90 with travel · adventurous
Somewhere new to both of us
A day trip to a town or park that neither of you has seen.
Exploring somewhere new to both of you puts you on equal footing, and gives you a place that belongs to your story together.
The fun part: Neither of you being the tour guide, for once.
The length of your visit · Free · playful
The visit jar
Small ideas in a jar, and one pulled out each morning of your visit.
Pulling a surprise from the jar each morning gives you little adventures you both chose, and something to laugh about later.
The fun part: Pulling a slip each morning without knowing whose idea it was.
A weekend · About $40 to $100 · adventurous
A weekend of firsts
One first each day of the visit: a new food, place or skill.
Collecting firsts together gives you a string of new memories that belong only to the two of you.
The fun part: Keeping a tally of your firsts on a napkin.
About 2 hours · About $5 to $15 for pastries · adventurous
Jet lag sunrise
Wide awake at 5 am from jet lag? Catch the sunrise together.
Turning jet lag into a sunrise date gives you a quiet first morning together while the rest of the town is still asleep.
The fun part: Being the only two people awake in the whole neighborhood.
About an hour · About $15 to $30 · cozy
Last breakfast, next date
A slow last breakfast out, and the next visit planned on a napkin.
Plan your next visit over one last breakfast. It makes saying goodbye a little easier.
The fun part: Sketching the next visit on a napkin and taking a photo of it.
About 20 minutes · About $5 to $15 · playful
Half a photo strip each
Take one photo booth strip, cut it in two and keep half each.
Splitting one photo strip gives you each a matching keepsake, and a small reminder that the other half is waiting.
The fun part: Planning four poses, then forgetting them the second the flash goes.
Most of a day · About $10 to $30 · playful
A souvenir from us
Spend a day in the host’s town choosing one souvenir for the visitor.
Hunting for one small souvenir together can give the visitor a piece of your town to keep, and a day of wandering with a mission.
The fun part: Vetoing anything with the town’s name printed on it.
About 2 hours · Free · thoughtful
Last-night sunset walk
A sunset walk on the last night, and three favorite moments each.
Looking back at the visit together as the day ends gives you a gentle goodbye, and a few stories to carry home.
The fun part: Trying to pick only three favorite moments, and failing.
Most of a day · About $40 to $90 · cozy
The celebration we missed
Celebrate the birthday or anniversary you spent apart.
Celebrating a missed day in person, even weeks late, can make it feel whole, and gives you a second party to look forward to.
The fun part: Singing “happy belated” as loudly as you both like.
Most of a day · Free, using what you have · cozy
A rainy day in, together
Rain on the visit? Blankets, a puzzle and a film, all in one room.
A rainy day indoors makes room for doing nothing much in the same room, which is rare when you’re usually on a screen.
The fun part: Fitting a puzzle, a film and a very long nap into one day.
A weekend · About $15 to $30 · cozy
Our holidays, a little early
Celebrate the holidays together before you each go home for them.
Holding your own early holiday gives you traditions that belong to the two of you, even if you spend the day itself apart.
The fun part: Opening one small gift each a week early, and calling it tradition.
Across a weekend · About $15 to $30 · adventurous
Make something for this place
Build, paint or plant one thing for the host’s home over the visit.
Making something together for the host’s home gives you a project to laugh through, and a reminder of the visit every day after.
The fun part: Signing it somewhere hidden with both your initials and the date.
2 to 3 hours · About $50 to $100 for two · adventurous
The restaurant we saved
Finally try the place one of you has been saving for this visit.
Saving a place for when you’re together gives the wait something to look forward to, and the meal can feel like a celebration.
The fun part: Hearing why this was the place worth waiting for.